Thank you. I really needed to hear this and appreciate your openness and honesty in sharing it here. I haven't been doing well and there's definitely a fork in the road.
I'm so glad my post resonated with you. Thank you so much for letting me know you appreciate my openness and honesty. It means a lot! 🥰
So sorry to hear that you haven’t been doing well! There can be hard times in life. I hope that you feel better soon and take a path that's good and right for you. Please take care! Wishing you all the best! 💕
So true - and so sad really! Doing things differently, especially thinking differently, takes time, but I'm so glad to have started on a better path. Congrats on living true to yourself for so many years now! Inspiring and encouraging!
So much struggles and also so much wisdom. I think you're so right on being absolutely true to yourself. It so speaks to me as I recognise my own journey to what I call becoming a Wildflower.
And Claudia, you are so valuable and beautiful just being yourself. 💗
Thank you so much for your lovely words, Hilda! 🩷 It's so incredibly kind of you to say. 🥰
Maybe it's the struggling, the reflecting, the changes that lead to wisdom? I very much hope so. 😄 But I could also do with less struggle by now. 😉 Yesterday I even wondered if I should change my Substack's name (or - alternatively - the topics I write about here). Not everything is happy (although I love my quiet life!), and I don't have everything figured out myself. Is it misleading? Well, let's see where our journeys takes us! I love following yours, too! 🌸 💕
The not always so Happy life 😊, I call it the Wildmess :-) It's part of our lives... So for me, it's not misleading. I'm not always feeling that happy at the moment too. Maybe it's part of menopause (I'm turning 52), I don't know...
If you'd asked me a couple years ago I knew my 8year old self would have been pretty disappointed. For me this was one of the questions that helped me get on track again as well. I think 8 year old me would be much more proud by now. 🙂
Thanks for sharing, Sophie! That's so cool that this was one of the questions that helped you change your life as well! Amazing how powerful this little reflection can be, right? 😀
What I've learned about your journey so far, I'm certain, she would be proud! 🥰
I felt like I was reading about myself here. Thank you for sharing this. You are wonderful, just as you are, and you are valuable and deserve to take up space. 💛
Claudia, thank you so much for this beautiful insight into the connection between your 8-year-old and 80-year-old selves 🙏👣 I think many of us, myself included, have found ourselves trying to fit in and, in the process, losing touch with who we really are. I love that you’ve made this about realigning with what feels true, not for anyone else, but just for you 💞✨
Wow, this was very moving. I loved reading it and related to so many aspects, especially the trying-to-fit-in part. Thanks for sharing your journey. The idea of only needing to make two people proud in this world, one's 8-year-old and 80-year-old self, is beautiful. I might try conversing with my 80-year-old self now as well and see what advice she's got to offer.
Oh, I notice I did read this one - but I didn't even "like" it (I forgot to click the heart, I mean - I did like the text! And I see I even liked some other comments, just not your main text, haha). I guess this was in my rush catching up with Substack after I was ill!
Anyway, this makes a lot of sense to me... Such a good approach to think of your younger and older self. It's fascinating how even as adults we try to squeeze ourselves into certain shapes ("the intellectual" etc.) - I notice this in myself as well, some attempt at "personal branding" so that we're easier to grasp by others. I wonder if most people do this, or most people just live - I'm really not sure! I am more aware of that these days and also try to do it less, but it still comes back, especially in environments where there are certain expectations (like meeting new people at work where I feel like I have to come across as intelligent and insightful).
"I thought it would make me even more vulnerable, but I’ve realised it actually makes me stronger" - yes! I think the strongest people are those who don't hide their true personality. And pretending to be someone else, or restricting ourselves, is really such a waste of energy.
Yes, exactly, I've also wondered about this all my life, I guess: "Do most people do this, or do most people just live?" I haven't found an answer to this either. It would certainly be easier to just live, but do we have a choice? It must be wonderful to think less, to worry less, to care less and just live. But I can't switch it off, I'm sort of wired this way. So we need a different strategy. :)
It think it's totally normal at work to try to meet these expectations. Especially if you work in such a competitive environemnt like you do. But I know that it can be very stressful ...
I've often admired (and slightly envied) people who speak their mind, who don't try to fit in at all costs, who don't hide their true personality, who don't seem to worry about what others may think etc. It's a process and probably a long way to go, but I find it so relieving to have set out on this path now. And you are absolutely right, it's really such a waste of energy to do otherwise (and my energy is limited :)).
You always hear the phrase ‘be your own best friend’ which sounds so….. I'm not sure what word I'm looking for here, but when you truly do become your own best friend, life is no longer lonely or depressing, because you are living life aligned with your values. 🙂
This is definitely something to aim for. I have not been good at being my own best friend in the past. At the moment that title still belongs to my husband, he has always been much better to me than I've been to myself. But we are working on me having two best friends. 🙂
When I turned 50, I went through a low period. Then leaving school a year later, I had to think a lot about identity, who I am and wish to be. I think both the younger and older version would be happy to know me now. Reading your piece I feel spark, strength and determination. I believe you have all you need to live the life you want and be true to who you are.
Thank you, Terje, "spark, strength and determination", that sounds good! I'm glad. 😊 Maybe we sometimes have to go through a low period where we question ourselves, our identity and where we want to go from here in order to refocus on ourselves again. All the better when you have arrived at a stage where the younger and older you would be very happy to know you now. You chose well! 😀
Thank you. I really needed to hear this and appreciate your openness and honesty in sharing it here. I haven't been doing well and there's definitely a fork in the road.
I'm so glad my post resonated with you. Thank you so much for letting me know you appreciate my openness and honesty. It means a lot! 🥰
So sorry to hear that you haven’t been doing well! There can be hard times in life. I hope that you feel better soon and take a path that's good and right for you. Please take care! Wishing you all the best! 💕
I'm 61 now, and I have embraced being true to myself since I was in my 40s. It's amazing how far out we wander away from our authenticity.
So true - and so sad really! Doing things differently, especially thinking differently, takes time, but I'm so glad to have started on a better path. Congrats on living true to yourself for so many years now! Inspiring and encouraging!
So much struggles and also so much wisdom. I think you're so right on being absolutely true to yourself. It so speaks to me as I recognise my own journey to what I call becoming a Wildflower.
And Claudia, you are so valuable and beautiful just being yourself. 💗
Thank you so much for your lovely words, Hilda! 🩷 It's so incredibly kind of you to say. 🥰
Maybe it's the struggling, the reflecting, the changes that lead to wisdom? I very much hope so. 😄 But I could also do with less struggle by now. 😉 Yesterday I even wondered if I should change my Substack's name (or - alternatively - the topics I write about here). Not everything is happy (although I love my quiet life!), and I don't have everything figured out myself. Is it misleading? Well, let's see where our journeys takes us! I love following yours, too! 🌸 💕
The not always so Happy life 😊, I call it the Wildmess :-) It's part of our lives... So for me, it's not misleading. I'm not always feeling that happy at the moment too. Maybe it's part of menopause (I'm turning 52), I don't know...
Wildmess is a lovely expression, perfect, I like it! 😊
Yes, menopause, maybe it's part of that ... Very well possible ...
Well, let's seek for happiness anyway! 💞☀️🌸🥰
If you'd asked me a couple years ago I knew my 8year old self would have been pretty disappointed. For me this was one of the questions that helped me get on track again as well. I think 8 year old me would be much more proud by now. 🙂
Thanks for sharing, Sophie! That's so cool that this was one of the questions that helped you change your life as well! Amazing how powerful this little reflection can be, right? 😀
What I've learned about your journey so far, I'm certain, she would be proud! 🥰
I felt like I was reading about myself here. Thank you for sharing this. You are wonderful, just as you are, and you are valuable and deserve to take up space. 💛
Thank you for saying this, Victoria, that's so kind of you! It means a lot! 💗
I'm glad the text resonated with you. Let's make our past and future selves proud and happy! 🥰
Amen to that!!! 🙌🏻
Claudia, thank you so much for this beautiful insight into the connection between your 8-year-old and 80-year-old selves 🙏👣 I think many of us, myself included, have found ourselves trying to fit in and, in the process, losing touch with who we really are. I love that you’ve made this about realigning with what feels true, not for anyone else, but just for you 💞✨
Thank you so much for your lovely reply, Dana! I really appreciate your words! 💞
Wow, this was very moving. I loved reading it and related to so many aspects, especially the trying-to-fit-in part. Thanks for sharing your journey. The idea of only needing to make two people proud in this world, one's 8-year-old and 80-year-old self, is beautiful. I might try conversing with my 80-year-old self now as well and see what advice she's got to offer.
Thank you so much, Alex! I'm glad it resonated with you and you found something useful to try yourself! 😊
Oh, I notice I did read this one - but I didn't even "like" it (I forgot to click the heart, I mean - I did like the text! And I see I even liked some other comments, just not your main text, haha). I guess this was in my rush catching up with Substack after I was ill!
Anyway, this makes a lot of sense to me... Such a good approach to think of your younger and older self. It's fascinating how even as adults we try to squeeze ourselves into certain shapes ("the intellectual" etc.) - I notice this in myself as well, some attempt at "personal branding" so that we're easier to grasp by others. I wonder if most people do this, or most people just live - I'm really not sure! I am more aware of that these days and also try to do it less, but it still comes back, especially in environments where there are certain expectations (like meeting new people at work where I feel like I have to come across as intelligent and insightful).
"I thought it would make me even more vulnerable, but I’ve realised it actually makes me stronger" - yes! I think the strongest people are those who don't hide their true personality. And pretending to be someone else, or restricting ourselves, is really such a waste of energy.
Yes, exactly, I've also wondered about this all my life, I guess: "Do most people do this, or do most people just live?" I haven't found an answer to this either. It would certainly be easier to just live, but do we have a choice? It must be wonderful to think less, to worry less, to care less and just live. But I can't switch it off, I'm sort of wired this way. So we need a different strategy. :)
It think it's totally normal at work to try to meet these expectations. Especially if you work in such a competitive environemnt like you do. But I know that it can be very stressful ...
I've often admired (and slightly envied) people who speak their mind, who don't try to fit in at all costs, who don't hide their true personality, who don't seem to worry about what others may think etc. It's a process and probably a long way to go, but I find it so relieving to have set out on this path now. And you are absolutely right, it's really such a waste of energy to do otherwise (and my energy is limited :)).
Oh I relate so much to this Claudia.
It's so empowering when we finally decide to live life for ourselves.
Yes! It feels so good to finally be on that path. :)
You always hear the phrase ‘be your own best friend’ which sounds so….. I'm not sure what word I'm looking for here, but when you truly do become your own best friend, life is no longer lonely or depressing, because you are living life aligned with your values. 🙂
This is definitely something to aim for. I have not been good at being my own best friend in the past. At the moment that title still belongs to my husband, he has always been much better to me than I've been to myself. But we are working on me having two best friends. 🙂
🙏💛✨️
When I turned 50, I went through a low period. Then leaving school a year later, I had to think a lot about identity, who I am and wish to be. I think both the younger and older version would be happy to know me now. Reading your piece I feel spark, strength and determination. I believe you have all you need to live the life you want and be true to who you are.
Thank you, Terje, "spark, strength and determination", that sounds good! I'm glad. 😊 Maybe we sometimes have to go through a low period where we question ourselves, our identity and where we want to go from here in order to refocus on ourselves again. All the better when you have arrived at a stage where the younger and older you would be very happy to know you now. You chose well! 😀