On (Not) Buying Stuff

Consumerism is not for me

We don't consume much.

We buy food and hygiene articles, of course, the occasional battery or shirt, but other than that, not much.

We wait a long time before we buy something. A very long time. Often years. Especially for the household or clothes or something technical. Because we can make do with what we have for a long time, and because most of the time it's enough anyway, even if it doesn't fit together perfectly aesthetically. Mostly we end up buying nothing at all.

People make fun of us of “not having managed” to buy ceiling lamps for the rooms in our house in four years. But we don't need fancy lamps. Simple bulbs work fine when we enter the room, warm simple light reaching all corners. We like small table lamps more as they are much more flexible and can easily put where needed. It’s a much cosier light anyway.

For my desk I had wanted to replace my office chair that broke down shortly before we moved. I didn’t. I still use a wooden kitchen chair with cushions. I carry it between tables and rooms and this arrangement works fine.

I like my furniture multifunctional like the lamps or my nightstand that used to be my deskchair when I grew up.

Apropos, my desk is 42 years old. I have it since I was 8 years old and it moved to various flats with me. (Just for the first one it was too big, but I didn't need it anyway when I trained as a bookseller. The writing I had to do then, I could do at the kitchen table.) It’s perfect, it’s generously sized and adjustable in height. I wrote all my books, short stories, university stuff at it. And now my Substack (and more books).

I gave my huge wardrobe away for charity when we moved from our flat into our house which might be surprising because wouldn't I have more space here? For more things?

In theory and in square metres, yes, but I decided to use my second bookshelf for my clothes instead. I didn’t need two for books any more. Mind you, not the first one is full nowadays.

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Here’s why:

Books: From 1,200 to less than 120

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I like seeing all my clothes - neatly folded and stacks sorted by colour - at one glance. Nothing is hidden, so I it’s easy to recognize what I wear often and what not. And what I no longer wear, I give away.

I don’t have much stuff any more. And I feel all the better for it.

In the spring, I thought of buying a small table for the patio with two matching chairs.

We do a have bench, we do have a table (I can’t carry because it’s too heavy) that is usually stored away in our shed and two simple staple chairs (inherited from my grandma seven years ago).

I don’t sit in the sun. After two minutes I feel unwell. I’m a shade hunter. So moving around on the patio from shady spot to shady spot is essential for me. (It has to be house shade or tree shade, a parasol doesn't work for me long.) Not possible with the bench and the heavy table. That’s why I wanted a small and lightweight combo. Not too much to ask, isn’t it? It would probably even look nice.

If I hadn’t waited (as a habit and also for energy reasons), I wouldn’t have realised that buying a table would be enough, no new chairs needed.

A week later, after having tried to arrange the heavy table and the not matching, but fitting chairs on the patio at several spots, I was happy with a constellation. It was functionary for all my purposes. And flexible. So I didn’t even buy a new table.

I also decided against a lounger, although I thought I wanted one for years. I found out I’m very comfortable with our garden chairs, the bench - or a picnic blanket on the “lawn” under the tree.

Money saved, less belongings, less stuff to store, to take care of, more space in the shed in the winter.

We often thought about replacing our sofa and the two armchairs because their covers have faded over twenty years (blue covers were not the best idea in hindsight). But we haven’t found anything remotely comfy or worth buying for a reasonable price. And there’s nowhere we could lounge better, they are so comfy, still! So they stay and we are happy.

We got our TV when my mother-in-law bought herself a new one and we put it on a TV table that was left over when we cleared out my grandma's house.

We don’t have an instagrammable house and we don’t want one. We love it like it is.

I don’t adhere to the simple living aestethic or fashion so often promoted on social media. Nothing here looks perfect, but it’s perfect for us.

I “inherited” all my bikes since I was in my teens from great-grandparents and grandparents successively when they didn’t ride a bike any more. Not because I had to, not because we didn’t have any money, but because I wanted to. I loved the old, black, sturdy bycicles. The last one (a brown Dutch bike from 1978) I got from my mother when she bought herself a new one. It lasted 43 years. Neither of it had gears or anything even fancier.

My grandmother with one of the olden black bikes

When something works and serves its purpose I don’t see any reason to replace it. There’s no need for me to change, to update, to upgrade. I’m pretty immune to advertisement by now. I don’t watch TV (apart from biathlon in the winter). I don’t read magazines. I use ad-block on the internet. This helps.

I’m a minimalist at heart. We don’t have much decorations, only a few, carefully selected items. I don’t redecorate regularly or with the seasons. I like the change of the seasons outside. I don’t need special decorations to feel or embrace the seasons. I look outside. Or better: I go outside. I don’t buy cut flowers either, I much prefer to enjoy them in the garden, where they not only please my eye, but also benefit insects and themselves. But we do have houseplants (and they all have names).

For the garden I often get perennials from my parents’ garden. We also share garden equipment that is not used that often.

We don’t buy boardgames or puzzles and seldom books, we use the library for all of these instead. We used to buy DVDs of films we really loved, but since streaming services have become omnipresent, movies are less and less sold on DVD. And because we use streaming services very rarely and very intentional for just one month if we can’t get new British crime series or movies I’d really, really love to see any other way, we watch less movies. It’s very rare that I miss that. As the saying goes, something else fills the void, and for me it’s often books, nature, conversations and a whole lot of creative acitivities. What’s not to love?

I don’t like shopping - neither online nor offline. As a highly sensitive person I feel easily overwhelmed by browsing, scrolling, the too-muchness of choices and stuff. I’m also very sensitive when it comes to seams or the feel of fabrics in general. A lot of things scratch, it's unthinkable to wear wool against my skin, for example. I also suffer a lot from the smells of new furniture or the like. This is another reason that I use everything I have as long as possible.

I’m no fan of the ever faster innovation cycles with ever shorter product life cycles - especially in technology. I don’t like to be forced to buy a new smartphone just because the banking app or the health insurance app won’t work after their latest updates. (But I do it grudgingly.)

I don’t need the newest gadget, I’m not interested in the lastest trend or fast fashion.

I don't need much - and most things last long. We treat all the things we have with great care. We cherish what we have, every single item. And when we do get something new, we appreciate it every day for years.

Not buying stuff never feels like doing without. It feels intentional and self-determined.

Part of a Happy Quiet Life indeed.

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